Happy Gotcha Day!!

1 year ago today we held you for the first time! Daddy and I landed in Ethiopia late Sunday night and didn't get to sleep until early Monday morning. I was so excited that I got up early and got ready as quickly as I could. I checked and rechecked your diaper bag and was nervous that I might have forgotten something. I couldn't eat breakfast because my stomach was full of butterflies. I just couldn't process that I was finally in the same city that you were, let alone that I was going to get to touch you and kiss you in a matter of minutes.

It was dark outside when we had arrived in Addis Ababa and when we pulled out of our hotel the next morning I was wide-eyed. The sights were overwhelming. There was a naked man walking down the street. Another man was relieving himself on the side of the road. The sides of the streets were covered with people - some walking, some sleeping, some crippled, some just babies. There were donkeys walking through traffic. It was so difficult to try to take in what I was seeing when I was on the way to meet you for the first time. Part of me had to put off thinking these things through fully until I got back to the States.

We pulled up to the orphanage and I was conciously trying to remember as much of this place as I could. You had spent 5 months of your life here and I wanted to etch it into my memory. There were flower trees and lots of laundry drying on ropes all around. I walked down the hallway leading to the baby room. Daddy started to take video behind me. We turned into the room and there you were. There you were! My daughter, my joy, my heart! I knew I had to ease over to you, but I just wanted to scoop you up and hold you close. You cried when you saw me. I was slowly able to take you and feed you your bottle. You warmed up to me very quickly after that. I remember that I just kept thinking, "Thank you, God for this amazing gift. Thank you, God! Thank you, God! Thank you, God!"

We stayed at the orphanage and played for a few hours and then went back to the hotel. You napped. I layed next to you and just stared at you. I couldn't get over your beauty. Your lashes, your rosebud lips, your soft skin, your curly hair, your tiny fingernails - you were perfect in every way. When you woke up I bathed you and held you on my chest, skin to skin, for an hour. We just sat there on the bed and snuggled. Every few minutes you would look up at me and then lay your head back down. I will always treasure these moments. You kept looking at me as if to say, "Wow, you're still here? You're still holding me?" And then, after about an hour you bounced up and were ready to play. We played and laughed and snuggled. I made all sorts of animal noises for you and you laughed so hard. We sang songs. What a special joy-filled day.

That night, our first meal in Addis was wood-fired pizza. So, I decided that we would make that our Gotcha Day tradition and tonight we will celebrate our 1 year anniversary with pizza. (Well, technically you had formula that night, but pizza sounds better to me.)

Annie, you truly are a physical manifestation of the goodness of God in my life. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. I once heard that to become a mother is to forever have your heart go walking around outside of your body. It is so true. It's true for me and it's true for your Daddy. Each day that God gives me with you is pure grace. My days are so full of happiness. Being your mother, directing you to Jesus, heaping as much love on you as I have strength, this is my calling in life.