Missing My Girl and Missing My Africa

I miss Sophie. I miss her so much that most days I feel like booking a flight and going back. I want to see those chubby cheeks and arms, her bald head, and the little blinking thing she does with her eyes when she's being bashful. I want to hear her say, "Nah, nah, nah, nah" in her sweet, raspy little voice. I want to feed her another bottle before she's finished drinking from bottles. I want to rock her and sing to her. I don't want to miss anymore smiles or milestones. What if she's walking when I go back? What if she's talking? What if I miss all that? What if...

And then there's Africa - my beloved Ethiopia. I miss it. Life seems harder when I'm there and I miss my comforts, but comfort loses something once I'm here. There are so many needs there. All throughout each day pictures of things I've seen pop into my mind. Needy faces are seared into my memory, begging for help. What do I do? Am I supposed to do it from here or from there? I don't know. I'm not sure what God has planned for me, for our family. I know that I love Ethiopia. I know that I cannot forget the hopelessness I've seen on so many faces. I cannot forget the deep poverty. I will not forget the hungry children. I cannot forget...